"The Carnival Of Chaos" Will the Merry Go Round Of Pain ever come to an end? Are we able to understand the ego or the Joker role our nemesis holds onto?

  The Carnival Of Chaos grows into the carnival of carnage. What a sight to be seen. With shadows & fear around every corner. Frustration and anger found within every mirror. Hatred boils inside the mind of the abandoned, repressed & enslaved. Life may never be tasted by those that constantly crave. Wanting & striving for what you already have, makes it fade away into the distant haze of confusion. Lost within the maze of the mind. Caught up in the cataclysm of illusion our thoughts wonder endlessly. The thought on top constantly running you down! With nowhere to hide form your own subconscious mind. The torment you find resides within. Due to expectations and assumptions mixed with judgment inside of judgment. We may never escape from the mental torment of a negativity derivative or framework laid. The roots of the problems always reside within. Look deep into yourself and behind your words & actions to find true intentions. View them to be able to proceed.

  

  The only way through the belly of the beast is to dive right in, or so it may seem.🤔 This is and isn't true, for what you believe you will precieve. Your beliefs shape reality as you see it. The layers of what you are able to comprehend will be limited or expanded by those personal beliefs. This is true on many levels. Stepping up to the next one is all up to us as individuals. Finding ways around the truth is what got us mixed up in the first place. Thinking that anyone "especially you" is ever exempt from anything or special is pompus as well as prosperous. You are me as I am you. He is she & they are we & we are all together. This statement also has many levels and layers to the truths it holds onto. In the same way that we as individuals hold onto everything we can. Clinging to life as if it is fading away only makes it do so. Letting go of pain and assumed trauma is no different than anything else we grasp for. Clinging onto the past is mostly all we will ever do. Hoping for a better tomorrow only ensures this feeling of lost and confusion.

  We simply need to relenquis our past transgressions. Those done onto us as well as the ones we have forced upon others. Taking personal responsibility is the only way to hop off that crazy carnival of self inflicted abuse. Pain is half of our experience when it comes to pleasure. Often times you will fall into the statement "I've been down so long that it looks like up to me". This can be turned around quite easily with a few mental pivots and shifts, that I would be happy to teach you. As my life was nothing but observation of what forms the fog of domestic violence. This is all you have ever been doing too. Understand what I mean by domestic violence. Everything good that ever happened is a byproduct of someones personal strife & experiential past. We view our lives in certain ways and want to better them. No matter who you are there will be an assumption of abandonment from time to time. Felling as if you aren't being heard is a shared experience.

  That is most of the reason for any argument at all. Feeling as if your point is not valid or important to then share that with others. This is a sure way to see if someone has self control or not. As it were, most of the time playing with other people's emotions seems to be a common pass time. Though this simple form of manipulation almost goes unnoticed. The ramifications will leave ripples in the pond that is you. The action taken will have it's own sets of ramifications that all seem to keep finding you. The only one that can or will pay for what you have said and done is you. You & you alone will pay the price to your own conscience and subconscious. Basically the same thing in a lot of ways, while remaining quite different indeed. One just makes you feel bad in the moment. While the other haunts you day and night with a constant mind chatter that just won't shut up. Never-ending reminders of your short comings & dreams that you should have never gave up on, keep you at the whim of pain and mental torment. As if you were terrorising yourself.

  We may find that we are on a ride driven by a whirlwind of pain. The Carnival Of Chaos remains & the show must go on. No matter who you have cast in the roles of the mirrors you keep surrounding yourself with, as you throw other people and relationships away. Like old baseball cards you don't think are worth as much as the special ones you never seem to find. Let's be honest, do you really ever even really try? Truly try to be understanding? Truly try to keep an open mind? Do you truly try to let others make their own decisions and mistakes without holding things against them or over their head? Are you able to allow bigons to be bigons? Have you ever even truly tried to enjoy life and share that with the world? Or do you lord power & control over others? Looking into the mirror maze of the truth can hurt at times. I won't get into any self realizations that actually cut to the core. We are all kind of lowley dogs when we want to be crass and abrasive. There is no excuses for anything we force onto others in the form of self abuse spilled over. We all regret what we said as soon as we speak and didn't mean it. Yet finding ways to apologize seem to be just out of reach. Lost within the fog of domestic violence again and again. Will we ever find the courage to step through and actually wake up? 

  My online courses might just be the answers you are looking for. With instantaneous results through meditation you may find the light at the end of the tunnel. There may be more than meets the eye when it comes to pleasure and pain. Understanding the ego and self realizations await. Join us & you may just find a new way of thinking that breaks free from the mental chains that bind. Training the body & training the mind are within your control. Classes will be available soon.

💛🙏 ☯

Namaste